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Rants on the Beach

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This week in Jerry's Ink: '...I've got an incredibly accurate picture of those people who beach walk. If they walk alone, fast, with their fists up on their chest, staring straight ahead like zombies, they mistakenly believe that this is exercise and they are walking away from death.... They're walking in soft sand, which is putting a strain on their heart. They have the sun unmercifully beating down on their heads and they're perspiring like Bernie Madoff walking into a crowded prison shower where his new, nude, 300-pound friend Bubba awaits him.' Jerry Della Femina, oceanfront homeowner, is not a fan of a walk on the beach. [The Indy]